Monday, July 31, 2006

Mel's Mystery: Can't get enough of that Sugar Tit

The search for the source of Mel Gibson’s use of the term “Sugar Tits” amid alleged anti-Semitic ravings after a drunk driving bust has spread around the world.

Sugar Tits? Where the heck did he get that from?

Well, as we're finding, the term's been out there, long before Mel used it in reference to a female deputy.

Our Man Elli in Israel, who thinks we went to on easy on Mel by pointing out the hallucinogenic qualities of tequila, writes from the war front in Haifa:

On “Sugar Tits”—I also stopped at that one. I remember distinctly that there was a bit-part hooker in some movie in the late 60s/early 70s who was called Sugar Tit. I think in some western, like Butch Cassidy or McCabe and Mrs. Miller. It was a well-known movie because I've seen it a number of times and l always smiled at the reference…

Then we’ve found there’s actually a town called Sugar Tit, South Carolina. It’s been in the news in annexation fight: “The Town Council approved the first of two readings of an annexation ordinance late Thursday, potentially protecting the nearby Abner Creek and Sugar Tit communities from being consumed by development, but also potentially opening the town up to a legal challenge..”

And we found this photo and caption on flckr:

You can barely tell by the sign, but Laura and Charlie are grabbing themselves by a sign entitled "Welcome to Sugar Tit, South Carolina." There's also the Sugar Tit race track, a small race track for go-carts. You can only guess how embarrassing it was to ask for directions at the gas station.

Any clues on Sugar Tits? Send them here.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Mel Gibson & the mystery of "Sugar Tits"

It pales in comparison to Mel Gibson’s shameful and perhaps tequila-hallucination-induced anti-Semitic rant when he was arrested for barreling drunk down the PCH with a brown-bagged bottle of Cazadores on the seat… but there’s another term in the arrest story that's caught our eye:

A law enforcement source says Gibson then noticed another female sergeant and yelled, "What do you think you're looking at, sugar tits?"

Sugar Tits???

That’s a new one to us.

So we googled it-- and found 1,700,000 results.

There’s a webcam site

a gal (left) who calls herself Sugar Tits on My Space...

a story by Danny Fulks...

and an entry in the Urban Dictionary:

1. sugar tits term used by jonathan valasquez to describe the ULTIMATE pair of succulent tits… DAMN! that slut has some nice sugar tits, oh hey rooby

2. sugar tits 1.) the act or being sugar titty. Being Fruity. 2.) the ultimate perfect pair of tits. Stop acting like such a pair of sugar tits... woah...-drools- look at them sugar tits.

So we suppose it was a compliment. But don‘t even think of doing a Google image search.

Lesbian Leifer outed by LA's best gossip column

Carol Leifer is a lesbian! We never think about Carol Leifer, and never in any sexual way. We’ve just known her as the female stand-up comic who was best known for being Jerry Seinfeld’s ex-girlfriend, and who was supposedly the model for the “Elaine” character on his TV series.

We always considered Seinfeld to be a “gay sitcom,” portraying the life of the tidy urban homosexual and his small circle of friends, but we never for a moment would think that the saucy Elaine was actually a sister of Sappho. Carol Leifer, who’d write and produce for Seinfield and other shows, was a broad, one of the gals who’s one of the guys.

But now, as far as we know, she’s been outed-- outed as a lesbian who lives with a female partner named Lori, with whom she's bought a new house to make room to adopt a baby boy.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. It just leads to a more important story.

Because we didn’t read this nugget in The Enquirer or a column by Michelangelo Signorile, or even The Advocate. No, this piece of television gossip is in today’s LA Times, on page one of the Real Estate section, lead story of the Hot Property celebrity real estate transaction column.

Sorry, Defamer. Hot Property is the best gossip column in Los Angeles.

Today alone, we learn that Sharon Stone is flipping a house she bought in April for 11 million dollars-- on impulse... Nancy Davis, daughter of former 20th Century Fox owner Marvin Davis, and mother of fat sweatball Brandon Davis (who launched that pornographic tirade against poor Lindsay Lohan), has put her Bel Air mansion on the market for just under $30 million (and isn’t she involved in a family feud?)...Ed McMahon may be preparing for the end, selling his home at age 83... and a 19-year-old kid who stars on the Showtime series "Weeds" has become a first-time home buyer with a $595,000 condo.

Hot Property is matter-of-fact, all exclusive, privacy-invading, and trumps the paper's Calendar section and related blogs. There's a reason we told the kids that Hot Property was a must-read when we helped in the ill-fated relaunch of A Current Affair. Mike Walker and People magazine would pay for these scoops like this.

Which raises more questions: Are there any heterosexual comediennes out there? Do they start out as straight, but turn to the fairer sex because they’ve taken so much abuse in relationships with male comics? Keep an eye on Sarah Silverman. And discuss among yourselves.

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Mel Gibson's shame: Was it "the tequila talking"?

From the Mel Gibson arrest report: "While conducting an inventory of Gibson's vehicle, I found a 750 mg bottle labled, 'Cazadores Tequila', that was approx. 3/4 full of liquid contents, concealed in a brown paper bag... within easy reach of Gibson while he had bveen driving..."


No excuses for Mel Gibson. We've met him, seen his work and know his local and tabloid reputations, but we don't know him or what's in his heart.

But we have, in past decades, been acquainted with tequila.

And we know there's a major difference between the effect of beer... wine... vodka... or whisky... and that of too much tequila.

Tequila is something else altogether.

Tequila can be a wonderful thing, but consumed unwisely, it is the devil's juice. It can safely be considered a drug-- less a truth serum than a hallucinogen.

And though we do not endorse the 12-step program(ming), we do know that an excessive binge on tequila can summon demons that a person may have dedicated his life to overcoming.

Considering Mel Gibson's upbringing, controversy, religiosity, Catholic guilt and apparent inner rage, it is very possible that he did indeed come to his senses with a deep sense of embarrassment and shame.

See Tabloid Baby. Pick a chapter.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Is this why Carmen Electra left Dave Navarro?

The Rock Star: Supernova connections just won't quit. Here's Joan Jett's latest video, "A.C.D.C." starring the Rock Star judging star's estranged wife, Carmen Electra as a Bisex & The City gal who makes her way across men and women to get to a Joan Jett show.

The video's notable for its lack of promised girl-on-girl action, Joan's "Lass Bass" coming out after decades of coyness (freeze the video on her guitar to see a cartoon sticker of two girls holding hands and a prominent "69"), and her apparent plastic surgery-- a makeover that's turning her into the next Cher. Which isn't a bad thing.

And it's not too late for A.C.D.C. to be the song of the summer. It rocks in a glammy way, like Joan did back in the old days when we saw her breaking in the Blackhearts at the Peppermint Lounge.

(See and hear a higher-quality version of A.C.D.C. here. We had to move it off the T.B. site because it starts up automatically, making everyone jump up every time we click on.)

Who Is Killing The Great Blues Artists of America?

Floyd Dixon, the singer and jump-blues pianist who dubbed himself "Mr. Magnificent," died July 26 in Orange, California. He was 77. Dixon's best-known song was the raucous "Hey Bartender," which was made popular by the Blues Brothers. His other recordings included "Wine, Wine, Wine," "Call Operator 210," "Telephone Blues" and Lieber & Stoller's "Too Much Jelly Roll”...

Jessie Mae Hemphill, a blues musician whose award-winning career lasted decades, died July 22 in Memphis, Tennesee. She was believed to be 71. Hemphill won the W.C. Handy Award— the blues community's equivalent of a Grammy— for best traditional female blues artist in 1987, 1988 and 1994...

Sam Myers, a blues musician best known as a singer and harmonica player, died July 17 at his home in Dallas, Texas. He was 70. Myers had been with Anson Funderburgh & The Rockets as their featured vocalist since 1986. Collectively, they won nine W.C. Handy awards. He was a drummer with blues great Elmore James from 1952 to 1963 and had performed with many others...

We know they Die in Threes, and we're cautious with our conspiracy theories, but in recent weeks, the names keep piling up in the obituaries. We were in Chicago recently, and for the first time couldn't find a recognizeable name in the Blues Club listings to make it worth the trek to Muddy Waters, Kingston Mines, B.L.U.E.S. or the Checkerboard Lounge. So after Katrina, it just makes us wonder.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Never mind Storm & The Balls! Here's Brooke!

One of our Tabloid Baby staffers just earned a corner office by pointing out the real Rock Star: Supernova pin-up bonanza!

All this time that CBS has been using us to promote their "talent" search series-- teasing us with clues to finding semi-naked shots of a contestant named Storm Large posted on the Internet-- the web has been heaving with years of nude modelwork by the show's very host, Brooke Burke!

Forget Julie Chen-- just add Tommy Lee and Dave Navarro and you've got the new Tiffany network on one couch!

So in light of the possibility that we've been duped into helping hype the show on the tattooed back of that six-footer with a band called The Balls, we figured Brooke should take one for the team as well.

You already know where to find video of Tommy Lee and his ex.

(And yes, there are shots that we won't show on this mostly safe-for-the-office website. We found a bunch of Brooke here).

Storm's back... and front... in new Rock Star pix

A few sexy photos on the Internet, even ones showing bodily fluids or a reasonable facsimile spattered across your face, never hurt anyone's rock 'n' roll cred-- if you're a female, that is-- and while Lance Bass keeps his intimate shots to himself, Rock Star: Supernova contestant Storm Large got a big boost from the obviously planned "controversy" over the seminude, kinky pix that CBS seemed to censor but actually placed in and around cyberspace so we could join in the fleshy treasure hunt.

After allowing Storm to urge fans to "google" her unclothed image, the show's writers last night put in a few words about "crashing hard drives" to keep the search alive.

And while the contestants -- and judges-- are getting more ludicrous by the week (former Guns N' Roses guitar slinger Gilby Clarke actually was offended when the short, older lady contestant grinded on him during "Brown Sugar"; we were more offended that she was screeching about slave ships and "black girls" during the lily-white-but-for-the-house-drummer-and-maybe-Brooke-Burke broadcast-- let alone the producers' sexist ploy of using a contestant's nudie past to drum up publicity), Storm was an unexpected highlight of the piss-poor, must-watch show.

So, to mark the event, we've got a few more Storm Large studies until the next batch is leaked.

Find the Storm Large photo collection in this book

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Our Man Elli reports live from the Mideast warzone

"The helicopter crash occurred about one o'clock this afternoon, sparking a huge blaze which initially prevented firefighters, paramedics and IDF forces from getting close to the scene. The fire engulfed a hilltop orchard..."

That's Our Man Elli in Israel, reporting from outside Haifa on the fatal crash of an Israeli Army helicopter amid the campaign to destroy Hezbollah.

Native New Yorker Elli, veteran of the tabloid newspaper and local TV news wars and for more than a decade a resident of Jerusalem, is in deep in this one, as an IBA News television correspondent reporting live from the warzone. After many taped reports, he goes "live" from the field today-- for the first time.

The worldwide broadcast is historic in more ways than one.


A Katyusha is a rocket. That's humour from the trenches.

Check out Our Man Elli, our eyes and ears in the mideast and world of sports, and star of the upcoming documentary feature, Sex & Baseball. Go to the Israeli Broadcasting Authority website, click ENGLISH TV NEWS on the right of the screen, and watch an old school, no-frills news report on the action-- from the heart of Israel.

War is the constant x-factor in Elli's Sex & Baseball world...

See Elli in live and taped reports, and meet his femme colleague, the wonderfully named Viva Press.

UPDATE: Our Man Elli's first live television report is now available online:

"We go live now to IBA’s Elli Wohlgelernter in Haifa. Elli, what is the latest on today’s attacks?"

"Yes, Yochanon, there have been quite a number of Katyushas that have fallen across the north today. Let me begin first with the fatalities…"

Elli emails:
I am the replacement here for Viva Press. I actually worked with her 10 years ago at the Jerusalem Post. Meanwhile, I just took a walk down this street. It's all hotels and all the networks including Europe have their reporters lined up along the promenade (with the view of Haifa Bay in the background, which we switched today for a side shot because we have been doing that one for two weeks), and saw the Fox live report to Greta. I think her name was Kellogg (globetrotting reporter Amy Kellogg- ed.). I thought to myself, so this-- on a much smaller scale, of course-- is what Camp OJ must have been like.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Nelly Furtado shows off her athletic promiscuity

With the #1 single in Billboard's Hot 100, music star Nelly Furtado put her Promiscuous single aside to get promiscuous in the sports world last night, as special guest at NBA giant's Steve Nash's charity basketball game in Vancouver.

Tabloid Baby was there behind the scenes when the new sexy-selling Nelly exhibited athletic promiscuity--and J.Lo-like proportions!--by stopping to learn a high-heeled soccer trick or two on her way to her dressing room.

By the way, in Nelly's hit, Promiscuous, she raps:

"Hey is that the truth or are you talking trash
Is your game M.V.P. like Steve Nash...

Two-time NBA MVP, fellow Canadian and famed basketball longhair Nash sported a new buzzcut last night, as he received the prestigious Naismith Sportsmanship Award from Ian Naismith, grandson of the game's inventor, at center court.

Ian Naismith is about to jump to national prominence as a wildcard sports personality as he, Nash, the award and the whole shebang will be featured in the Frozen Pictures documentary film, Basketball Man, coming soon...

photos © Tabloidbaby.com

Friday, July 21, 2006

Exclusive! The Rock Star photos CBS tried to hide


The above photos of Rock Star: Supernova contestant Storm Large are from KG Photography on flickr.

The batch of photos above are from a book that's available here.

(Already, a photographic tribute to the Storm front has popped up here.)

Balls! CBS Rock Star censors miss the big picture

The CBS censors are hard at work covering up a Rock Star Supernova's Balls, but they should start by wiping her face.

We revealed yesterday that CBS has censored the very sexy website of a Rock Star contestant named Storm Large.

The homepage for Portland's "Storm Large & The Balls" let us know that the secrets within are off-limits while the show is on the air:

The Powers That Be in Hollywood asked us to take down some of our other pages for a while.

I know... we're as bummed as you are, but we cooperated.

In wake of the publicity over our scoop, the message on the site has been changed:

Some of the links on this site are inactive during Storm's appearance on Rockstar, per rules of The Powers That Be in Hollywood.

I know... we're as bummed as you are, but we cooperated...

So now it's the rules.

Rules against what?

Considering that the merchandise (selling CDs like "Hanging with the Balls" and "Vascectomy") and discussion links are still working, and her videos are readily available on YouTube, we'll guess it has something to do with the now-blocked photo gallery.

And judging from the very suggestive shot that remains on the partially-covered up on the homepage, we'd say they could use a box of Kleenex (and she's not even the contestant who sang Nirvana's "Come As You Are").

Other wannabes' sites have not been touched.

I guess we'll have to wait till Storm's booted off the show before we can dig into the secret treasures.

Censored homepage, before & after

And what the hell is splashed across her face???